#2 Tennessee @ #1 Memphis | Sharapova's Thigh

#2 Tennessee @ #1 Memphis

Posted by Matt Clapp | 2/23/2008 06:05:00 PM

Talk about a big regular season NCAA game. I don't think these are really the 2 best teams in the country, but they've earned their rankings up to this point. Memphis of course is on undefeated. They are led by phenom freshman point guard Derrick Rose(who will likely be the 2nd pick in this year's draft), swingman Chris Douglas-Roberts, and Joey Dorsey who is an absolute beast down low. Tennessee counters with another outstanding point guard in Chris Lofton, and rising NBA prospect Tyler Smith at small forward. This really should be an awesome game, and I'm pumped to watch it. Plus I already have a few drinks in me, with more likely on the way. I think I might do a "glog" for this game on here, which could be a disaster, but whatever.

(9:05 PM ET)- So I got ESPN on in time for the first commercial break. There's a preview for 10,000 B.C., and they say, "From the producers who brought you Independence Day and The Day After Tomorrow..." I didn't mind The Day After Tomorrow, but they are seriously promoting this new film which they hope to be a blockbuster by saying they made that movie? Man.

(9:10)- This is going to be a shootout. And Derrick Rose is fucking awesome.

(9:15)- Memphis already has made about 48 3's 6 minutes into the game.

(9:17)- Easily the best shooting seen this year from teams from Tenneesee in the FedEx forum where the NBA's Memphis Grizzlies play. I think I might rather have 5 players from this game than 5 players from the Grizzlies in my starting lineup.

(9:21)- Dan Shulman: "They continue to go chest to chest here out on the court." If only he were referring to Erin Andrews and another attractive woman in the building.

(9:27)- The Denver Nuggets called. They want their defense back.

(9:34)- Commerical for Taco Bell's new fiesta platter. We're gonna pass India in the "Top Diarrhea" rankings in no time.

(9:37)- Erin Andrews was just talking to Dick Vitale. Just hearing her say "Dick" makes me horny.

(9:45)- Imagine how good Memphis would be if they actually made free throws. I don't feel like looking those stats up right now, but a couple weeks ago I heard how they are the 2nd worst free throw shooting team in all of NCAA, shooting under 60%. Right now they're 3-6.

(9:53)- Bruce Pearl "Necklace" all over Erin Andrews.

(9:55)- I love it when you are about to head over to the liquor store to get a 12 pack of Budweiser longnecks, and then your roommate randomly walks in with that exact thing. Cheers.

(10:07)- So Rad and I decided to change the channel and see how our CSU Rams are doing against Air Force. CSU is (0-11) in conference. WE ARE WINNING BY 12 IN THE 2ND HALF!

(10:11)-Tennessee takes their first lead on a Tyler Smith bucket. I'm trying to figure out who he reminds me of. Maybe Josh Howard or Luol Deng.

(10:13)-Chism banks in a 3 for Tennessee, as I jizzum in my pants at another Erin Andrews sighting.

(10:29)- Lofton finally makes his first field goal to give the Vols a 4 point lead. It's incredible he's only made one shot and they're even in this game.

(10:42)- Dick Vitale is going to have a heart attack. Thankfully this isn't being played in Cameron Indoor.

(11:06)- In a 1 point game with 40 seconds left, Dorsey and Dozier(Memphis teammates) fight over a rebound, resulting in a travel. Now Tyler Smith makes a tough shot in the lane... 1 point lead Vols. Memphis runs a foolish play, probably should have called a timeout as Vitale is screaming about. Memphis has 4 NBA guys on their team, and they have Tony Anderson shoot with 10 seconds left?

(11:10)- Joey Dorsey talks shit, trying to get into the free throw shooter Prince's head. Prince is a 47% free throw shooter, and hits both of them. Derrick Rose comes down the floor, and the Vols wisely foul him up 3 points, making Rose shoot the freebies. Rose makes the first, misses the second intentionally, and the Vols rebound. Vols up 2 points, Lofton to the line, 3 seconds left.

(11:13)- The struggling Lofton fittingly hits both free throws, gives Memphis their first loss of the season, and propels his Tennessee Volunteers to the #1 ranking in all the land.

(11:15)- And Bruce Pearl ends the night by hitting on Erin Andrews again. My fucking Rams just lost in pretty much the same way Memphis did by the way. We'll never win another conference game. Drink up this Saturday night. Peace.


Update(2/25):
If you didn't believe me about Bruce Pearl hitting on Erin Andrews... somebody already posted it on youtube. Here's Bruce feeling up the lovely Ms. Andrews at halftime: