Breaking News: Roger Clemens is Friends with Jose Canseco | Sharapova's Thigh

In case you've been living under a rock for the last 5 weeks let me drop some knowledge on you: Roger Clemens is a cheater. He's made an ass of himself in front of Congress, he hired an attorney that was more fit to be a circus sideshow, and his face is fat. His legacy is clearly tainted, to what extent only time will tell. I thought he deserved everything he had coming to him.

Today ESPN has been all over this story that there are pictures surfacing of Clemens at a party hosted by Jose Canseco...........HOLY FUCKING SHIT STOP THE GODDAMN PRESSES, STORY OF THE FUCKING CENTURY. BASEBALLERS PARTY. I AM FREAKING SHOCKED.

Let me get this straight: You mean that Major League Baseball players party at their friends houses? Wow that is freaking mind blowing. I feel like I've been living under a rock for years.

Give me a fucking break. Before we even get to how stupid this particular situation is I need to point something out that is generally true. Baseballers party. There are tons of them that not only are not good athletes, but that are awful athletes. I'm sure anybody can relate to my undergrad experience with the baseball team. The baseball team at my school drank more than fraternity boys. These dudes had no conscience when it came to pounding Key Light. Clapp and I went to high school with a cat that is now in the Rangers system. The stories he tells about college ball (walking from the bars to the dugout and sleeping there for the night, among other things) are freaking priceless.

Back to the matter at hand. Since when has friendship with Jose Canseco been indictable? I realize that Jose is a sleazeball, I realize he's a schmuck, but why the F is the national media keeping this guy in the spotlight? This isn't like JC releasing his second book, this is the press making a big deal out of something that is absolutely fucking meaningless.