Midwest Region: Alyssa Milano(2) Vs. Jennifer Love Hewitt(5) | Sharapova's Thigh

UPDATE: ALYSSA MILANO IS IN THE THIGHNAL FOUR!!!!!!!

Road To The Thighnal Four Update: Our Elite 8 is set. To see all of the remaining participants, and how they got here, check out our full bracket. You can get there by clicking on the "Thighnal 4" logo on the right. Now, we've got a dandy of a match-up between 2 ladies that we've all known for years...


Alyssa Milano
It's definitely not a surprise that Alyssa is in the regional thighnals of our tournament. #15 Kari Byron never had a chance against her. Erin Andrews gave an admirable effort, but Alyssa's breasts proved to be too much for Erin to handle. Even in the Sweet 16, she was able to blowout Keira Knightley, which has caused quite a media stir in England.
Pretty much every male in America has had a crush on Alyssa Milano. If you haven't, well, maybe you should go find a "Hot Men" tournament somewhere instead. Alyssa is a naughty girl, having shown off those amazing knockers in quite a few films. She also has 8 tattoos. We also love Alyssa because she loves baseball, like every Thigh contributor does as well. She did some reporting crap for TBS during the MLB playoffs last year. She also keeps a baseball blog. I'm sweating as I type all this by the way. She also has her own line of clothing called "Touch", for female baseball fans, and ladies can purchase the apparel on mlb.com. Below we have an example of her showing off her baseball love, and either she's really cold, or gets turned on by baseball apparently. We'll accept either reason...

Jennifer Love Hewitt
As always, the 5-12 match-ups are never an easy task for the 5 seeds, and that was the case for J Love in the first round. The game stayed close until the last few minutes, when Jennifer's veteran leadership led to victory over Diora Baird. What really surprised us though, was her dominating performance, as an underdog nonetheless, against #4 Kate Beckinsale. Then came the victory over #1 Maria Sharapova in the Sweet 16, which I'm still losing sleep over. There's no doubt that Jennifer's earned this trip to the Elite 8.
Jennifer is your prototypical horror movie chick: giant tits, tight ass, terrible actress, nice scream, and a clumsy dumbass. We saw her put all of those characteristics on display in the I Know What You Did Last Summer movies. I only wish one of the things that I know she did last summer was me, HEY-O!