November 2008 | Sharapova's Thigh

Myron Rolle Is A Stud

Posted by Baron | 11/30/2008 11:54:00 PM | , ,

So when I think academics and college football, the last school I think of is Free Shoes University. When Myron Rolle was a recruit coming out of high school he was a top 15 player who graduated early from high school and said that he was really interested in academics... but then he chose FSU and people rolled their eyes and thought 'he sure cares about academics'.

Well, after graduating early with a focus in pre-med and winning a Rhodes scholarship, Rolle has gone full circle. According to ESPN.com, Rolle will be forgoing his senior year of eligibility to study in Oxford, England. The amazing thing about all of this is not that there is a smart football player, for instance Illinois' All-Conference Center (Ryan McDonald) has a GPA over 3.8 in Aerospace Engineering and has interned with NASA, but that a smart football player is sooo good. Rolle is an All-American with legitimate first day NFL talent, and he is foregoing the chance at the NFL for two years.

Kudos to Myron Rolle, a true scholar athlete.

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Yes, the Derrick Rose man crush is not leaving anytime soon. Today he put his talents on display in Philadelphia, and specifically on Andre Miller. Rose finished with 18 points, 10 assists, and 5 rebounds, in a 103-92 Bulls victory over the 76ers. Here's a video of him coming out of nowhere to reject Andre Miller, and then breaking Miller's ankles with a crossover on the next play(the layup counts by the way, goaltending on Philly).



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So I'm watching NFL Network because I have a sick addiction to the NFL. Gotta get in my "Playbook" fix every week with Baldinger and Sharpe. I like watching NFL film being broken down almost as much as I like watching Asian porn. Anyway, they showed a preview for their Sunday morning pregame show, "NFL Gameday". The preview said(and this likely isn't the exact quote but close at least), "Tomorrow on NFL Gameday, are the Patriots better off with Matt Cassel instead of Tom Brady? We'll discuss this..."

Um, seriously? This guy has a couple of great games, and we're already discussing if he's better for the Patriots than a QB coming off the greatest season in the history of QB's, and is one of the greatest QB's ever? Really?

Look, they'll probably just shoot down that talk immediately tomorrow, it's surely a way to just get some more viewers, and it's quite possible they were going somewhere else with this... but this even being suggested is more absurd than Amy Winehouse entering a supermodel pageant.

Tom Brady led the Patriots to 3 Super Bowl victories, was the Super Bowl MVP twice, and he's won pretty much every award possible. And he just had his best season last year for crying out loud: 50 TD(most ever in a season), only 8 INT(1 INT for over every 6 TD), had a passer rating of 117.2(2nd best ever in a season), and led his team to an undefeated regular season and another trip to the Super Bowl.

So yeah, if Cassel ever even sniffs those things, maybe we can talk about that. But it can't happen in one season and I'd bet my left nut he'll never get close to it, and the same holds true for almost everybody out there so I'm not ripping on Cassel.

Now, we don't know how Brady will recover from this injury, and if he's not close to what he used to be, then the argument of who is currently better for the team is understandable. Save that for next year though when we have a better idea of Brady's health. I don't care if Cassel completes every pass for the remainder of the season and playoffs, he still can't top Brady just yet. If Bill Belichick were asked if he'd rather have Tom Brady(assuming he's healthy) or Matt Cassel at QB, he'd probably laugh his ass off, and he NEVER laughs.

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If you hate the BCS...and I assume you do because you're a reader here and that makes you intelligent...then this is what you're pulling for Saturday.

And yes, I am bumping the Thigh of the Week. It's not Sunday, Clapp. It's football day. Ass.

But the Thigh of the Week is below.


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Alright. As of right now we have Alabama and a bunch of 1 loss teams before undefeated Utah. Let's operate under the assumption that short of the Apocalypse, Utah is not going to play for the National Title (though that would be a massive kick to the nuts of the BCS).

Florida vs Florida State - You're pulling for Florida State. You want the second loss placed on Florida.

Alabama vs Auburn - Roll Tide as you want them to maintain their undefeated season.

Next week: Florida vs Alabama - Now you're pulling for Florida. You've got the SEC champion with 2 losses and an Alabama team with only 1.

Oklahoma vs OK St - You're pulling for Oklahoma. This creates the 3 way tie in the Big XII South (You're also pulling for Texas Tech over Baylor).

Big XII Champ - Now you're pulling for the Big XII North Team to defeat whichever of Texas/Oklahoma made the championship game (assume that Texas Tech isn't going to make it, but not the end of the world if they did). For the purpose of this exercise, I am assuming Oklahoma made and lost this game.

Oregon St vs Oregon - You're pulling for the Beavers (like I do every morning in my shower). This makes Oregon St the PAC 1o champs.

You want Southern Cal to win out.

What this does to the BCS:

You have 4 teams (Alabama, Texas Tech, Texas, USC) all with 1 loss that are probably at the top of the BCS standings that did not even win their own conference. What do you do then if you're the BCS title game? Take Penn State? Can you take a 2 loss Florida or Oklahoma over these 1 loss teams? Does this put Utah into the question?

I don't know the answer to these questions. But it would be really interesting to watch the BCS incorrectly sort this out. My prediction would be both Alabama and Texas would make the title game, two teams that didn't even win their conference (and one team that didn't even play in the title game).


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Audrina Patridge

A lot of you probably hate this chick. She's a skank that does anything for attention and thinks she's the hottest thing ever. Well, I'll give it to her, she's pretty damn hot, and getting her thigh on here was long overdue.

Audrina's known for being a reality TV star on the MTV show The Hills. I've admitted before to seeing Laguna Beach multiple times which The Hills is a spin-off of, but I swear I've never seen this one.

Like former TOTW Laura Vandervoort, Audrina is in the upcoming straight-to-DVD movie Into The Blue 2.

There's really nothing else you need to know, other than there's new bikini pictures of her out just about everyday, and if you Google her with SafeSearch off, you'll see her boobies from some topless modeling she did just out of high school.

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Things will go better against the Seahawks this time around for Tony Romo.
Week 13's Best...

QB: Tony Romo.
It appears his finger his healed or at least good enough to be a kickass fantasy QB again. Romo threw for 341 yards and 2 TD, and has the 31st ranked Seattle pass defense at home on Thanksgiving.
RB: Ronnie Brown. The Dolphins' RB has been in a fantasy slump. The Rams and their 30th ranked run defense are the perfect slump buster, if you can't find a fat chick.
WR: Terrell Owens. With Romo's success comes T.O.'s success. 7 catches for 213 yards and a TD last Sunday against the 49ers. He should have another big fantasy performance Thursday.
TE: Tony Gonzalez. One of the few bright spots for the Chiefs this past Sunday as he had 10 catches for 113 yards and 1 TD. Against Oakland, no reason he can't have another huge day.
K: Rob Bironas. A very good kicker, indoors, and his offense should get into scoring position quite a bit.
D/ST: Baltimore Ravens. The Titans against the Lions might seem like the better choice, but the Lions are known for coming out and playing hard on Thanksgiving, and the fact that they're winless should only motivate them even more to play a good game. Of course, their lack of talent will probably prevent that from happening. Anyway, the Ravens defense is as good as any and against and should be a great play against the crappy Bengals.

Sleeper Picks...


QB: Joe Flacco.
The rookie QB has quietly put together some very good games of late. He has double-digit fantasy performances in his last 6 games. Look for him to continue that trend against the Bengals.
RB: Darren McFadden. It appears he's healthy and the Raiders gotta keep giving him the ball. 2 TD last week, and Justin Fargas just can't get into the end zone for whatever reason. He seriously does so well, then he needs 1 more yard, can't get it. So the Raiders then gave the rookie McFadden a toss and let him just run it in after Fargas failed a couple more times last week. And remember in week 2 against the Chiefs, McFadden ran for 164 yards and a TD. A duplicate performance would not surprise me one bit.
WR: Kevin Curtis. Donovan McNabb will be looking to have a huge game in particular, and Curtis is his most reliable target. He only had 2 catches for 12 yards last week, but that could even be considered impressive with how bad McNabb and Kolb were. The Cardinals' pass defense is below average, and Curtis should be able to get open and have a solid game.
TE: Greg Olsen. To beat the Vikings Sunday night in Minnesota, the Bears will have to pass the ball well as they're unlikely to run for much success against the Vikings' superb run defense that ranks 2nd in the NFL. In week 7 against the Vikings, Greg Olsen had his best game of the season, catching 6 passes for 74 yards and a TD. Plus tight end Desmond Clark is not a sure thing to play in the game with a knee injury, which would likely give Olsen even more time on the field.
K: Dan Carpenter. Pretty much identical to what I said about Rob Bironas.
D/ST: Buffalo Bills. Not a bad defense and they'll host a struggling 49ers squad. If you're looking for a defense for this week off the waiver wire, this is a solid choice.

Shit Picks...


QB: Matt Cassel. You can only go down after 2 straight games with only 400 yards. Plus he'll be facing the league's best defense. He can get double-digit fantasy points again, but another huge week isn't in the cards. I'd start at least 15 QB's over him this week, and that would be the case for just about any QB facing the Steelers.
RB: Tim Hightower. Last 3 weeks: 22 rushing yards, 35 rushing yards, 21 rushing yards.
WR: T.J. Houshmandzadeh. I just don't know if Ryan Fiztpatrick can get him the ball against the Ravens defense. He had 4 catches for only 20 yards last week against the Steelers, and he had only 3 catches for 44 yards against the Ravens in week 1. He's a terrific fantasy WR, but this shouldn't be one of his better weeks and I'd rank him out of the top 20 WR's this week.
TE: Vernon Davis. Yeah he has 2 TD's in his last 3 games, but he also only has 3 catches. Buffalo has to have this game, and as I already established, I like their defense in this game.
K: Matt Prater. The Broncos kicker was awful last week, going for 1 for 3 on field goal attempts. He's 5 for his last 10. Keep him out of your lineup until he shows some consistency.
D/ST: Carolina Panthers. The Packers need this game to keep up their hopes in the NFC North race(they'd drop 2 games back with a loss as the Bears or Vikings will get a win), so look for Aaron Rodgers to rebound with a good performance after a rough Monday night game.

My Week 12 Picks(scoring based off ESPN standard league settings)...
Best: Jay Cutler(6 Points), Matt Forte (24 Points), Anquan Boldin(14 Points), Tony Gonzalez(17 Points), Jeff Reed(9 Points), Pittsburgh Steelers(7 Points).

Sleepers: Kyle Orton(9 Points), Derrick Ward(15 Points), Deion Branch(1Point), Zach Miller (4 Points), Sebastian Janikowski (7Points), Cleveland Browns(8 Points).

Shit: Brett Favre(14 Points), Cedric Benson(3 Points), Marques Colston(13 Points), L.J. Smith(0 Points), Adam Vinatieri(13 Points), New York Giants(1 Point).


Plenty, plenty more to come. I just figured I'd get some of this up as soon as possible with 3 games to come Thursday and people maybe trying to make their fantasy football decisions quicker than usual. Most websites still don't have their rankings and other good fantasy articles up yet. I'll keep updating this baby, don't you worry.

And if you have a fantasy football article that you think I should link, e-mail me at sharapovasthigh@gmail.com.

UPDATE(11/26, 9:30 PM ET): Added a bunch of rankings, injuries, and some more articles since I originally published. I posted the injury report I just did for Fan IQ so make sure to check that out.

UPDATE(11/28, 2:00 AM ET). More links added. What exactly they were I don't remember because I'm drinking.

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On Thanksgiving. I have on the Nuggets-Clippers game, and the announcers are saying, "So buy a drink and get free tacos tomorrow from 3-5 at all Colorado Taco Bell locations." Okay, who is going to go to Taco Bell on Thanksgiving? Second, are they even open on Thanksgiving? Change the deal for Friday assholes.

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What I Watched - Maui
I've been watching a lot of the Maui invitational, which I guess may be partly due to being a dope and passing up going last year... anyways here is what I've learned through 3 days:
  • North Carolina is really, really good. They don't have everyone back or everyone up to speed yet, and they still are crazy good. They certainly look like the team to beat.
  • Notre Dame surprised me, I knew they were good, but I didn't really trust a team whose 2 best players have 4 syllable last names (McAlarney and Harangody)... I may have been wrong
  • Texas is good. They lost a great game to Notre Dame in the final minute, I still think that once they gel, they will be outstanding.
  • Oregon has uniforms just for Maui, at least I hope so.
    Otherwise why do they have flowers on them, you never know though, it is Oregon.
  • St. Joes and Alabama were in the tournament as well and Bama looked to be a decent team
  • The most enjoyable part of Maui for me was watching Indiana. Wow they are bad, they were blew out by Notre Dame and St. Joe's and then barely beat Chaminade. It could be a long, long season for the Hoosiers... which would make me very happy
What Happened
On Tuesday, Davidson took on Loyola (MD) and Stephen Curry was held scoreless. How? A triangle and two was used with 2 defenders trailing Curry everywhere. The result? Davidson playing 4 on 3 and routing Loyola by 30. After the game Loyola Coach Jimmy Patsos was pretty proud of himself saying:
"We had to play against an NBA player tonight," Patsos explained. "Anybody else ever hold him scoreless? I'm a history major. They're going to remember that we held him scoreless or we lost by 30?"

His team was down by 22 at the half and yet he kept playing 4 on 3 for the whole game. Wow.

What I Read
Citizens from Danville, Illinois have accused the high school basketball coach of racism, where 8 black students were cut from the basketball team. The problem? The team is all black. That isn't stopping outraged parents who have organized protests and asked for boycotts. Some of those cut have said it is because they wore braids, although others cut didn't have braids.

I just want to know how racial profiling was involved... wow. To read more click here.

What to Watch
First of all I want everyone to enjoy the Thanksgiving holidays, and want to remind you that there is plenty of basketball to watch coming up. Tournaments around the country will start to finish up in the next week, so that means that you can watch the finals of the Pre-Season NIT, Old Spice Classic and others. Next week also starts the Big10 - ACC "Challenge". Some of the games to watch in that are Duke at Purdue on Tuesday and UNC vs Michigan State (at Ford Field) on Wednesday.

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Thigh Board

Posted by Matt Clapp | 11/26/2008 01:28:00 AM | , ,

As many of you may have noticed, we have a "Message Board" tab now up under the banner. Yep, we've got a "Thigh Board". We've talked about this for a couple months and it's a big reason we wanted a site that was "tab friendly" at the top, rather than just listing the link to the board randomly on the sidebar of our old blog.

So if you wanna talk some sports, post and view some more thighs, and just shoot the shit with some people about literally whatever, feel free to join. You won't be able to get in unless you're 18 though, as there's sure to be a fair amount of adult content. Do note that if you act like a complete douche or we can tell you're lying about your age, you'll be out faster than Jason Biggs' load in American Pie.

Update: The name of the message board has been changed for the moment at least, to "Between The Thighs".

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Retro Games: EarthBound

Posted by FlyAtTheThigh | 11/24/2008 08:27:00 PM | , ,


It's sad, really. You look at the incredible hardware that's available now and you'd think that publishers would be producing some of the most amazing games of our time: amazing stories, amazing game play, and "all over your pants" graphics. And then you get things like this.

Have studios gotten lazy? Relying more on style than substance. I have no idea. But I do know this: in the pantheon of bad ass games, EarthBound remains a classic.

You are Ness, a boy from Eagletown. You're awakened by a noise one night...well damn, it's a meteor. Believe it or not, it's a bad idea to go examine the thing (has it ever been a good idea to examine a meteor? I think not. Unless you're me. I can't be harmed).

A bug from the future says that you must save the world. When a bug speaks, you listen man...you listen. Ness will go from town to town, running into some of the strangest characters on the SNES console. The Happy Happyist Group? Frank and his robot? An angry tent? Salvador Dali clocks? They're all here.

Photobucket
Mr Saturn! Boing!

It's nothing amazing graphically, even for a SNES game. It's not shoddy either, by any means. What will catch the gamer is the story and the humor therein. This is a game that's not meant to be taken too seriously, but also not meant to be a complete and total joke. EarthBound achieves the perfect balance.

I have beaten maybe 7 video games in my life. I've beaten EarthBound twice. That should say enough about the game (or my attention span, you be the judge). If I still owned a SNES, I'd own EarthBound. If emulators were legal, I'd recommend you download one and the EarthBound ROM.

Oh, and if you can get Poo's (yes, Poo) Sword of Kings, kudos to you. I've never had the patience to search for something that pops up 1/128th of the time.


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Thigh Goddess In GQ Spain(Pics & Video)

Posted by Matt Clapp | 11/24/2008 03:53:00 PM | , , , ,

As I told you last week, I'm now writing some fantasy football blogs for Fan IQ. By the way, it's an incredibly addicting website that you've gotta check out if you're a sports fan. I hadn't been there much before last week, and I had no idea what I was missing.

No, I'm not just saying that because I write over there now. When I wrote for the blog suggesting new hairstyles for Clay Aiken did I tell you to go over there? Nope. Or what about the Lizzie McGuire website? Please, I just stole their pictures.

Anyway, with my time over at Fan IQ, I'm making some friends with the readers and some of them have been checking out the Thigh. One such reader alerted me just a bit ago about a gold mine that's in fact, on Fan IQ! See how this is all coming together? What he showed me, are Maria Sharapova pictures from the December edition of GQ Spain, along with a video of the photoshoot. Does this sound familiar? Well we had some sexalicious pictures of Megan Fox from GQ, along with the video of the photshoot just a few days ago.

Note: Kneeling, chanting, or whatever holy act you find important are suggested while looking at the Thigh Goddess.




Link(Fan IQ)


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We Classed Up The Thigh

Posted by Matt Clapp | 11/24/2008 12:17:00 AM

After people, and specifically you readers speak, I listen. I've been hearing a lot about getting the site to look a little nicer to be taken more seriously, blah blah blah, well we did our best. It's a pain in the ass getting this to happen, and without Baron and Fella, this would've taken me months to do something we got done in a night.

Please excuse the arrangement of some things or if some things are missing, we lost a lot of important little things in the process which I'm trying to replace now. If there's anything noticeably missing, or you have any suggestions, please let us know.

Like it? Complaints are fine. Well I gotta get back to fixing this up, peace.

-Matt

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