(NSFW- Language)

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Is there anything that gives me a "facepalm" reaction in sports more than cheesedicks wearing customized sports jerseys of players that are not even on the team the jersey represents? I don't think so.

Brett Favre Eagles jersey this past offseason.

Brett Favre CUBS jersey(this one officially makes the least sense ever).

Albert Pujols Cubs jersey this season.

Fans of various teams(Knicks and Nets especially) wearing customized LeBron James jerseys last summer before he of course chose the Heat.

On and on.

It seems that most every time people wear these jerseys of players that are upcoming free agents, or are entering the upcoming draft in their sport, the players don't end up signing with that team. It's karma. Buy one of these jerseys, and karma's usually going to bite you in the ass.

But here these guys(pictured above, duh) were wearing Andrew Luck Colts jerseys to the Colts game against the Titans in Tennessee yesterday.

Is Luck going to be the #1 pick? Yes.

Would the Colts select him with the #1 pick, even with Peyton Manning to return next year? Unless they're offered some awesome trade package(and any trade package for moving up to get Luck would indeed be awesome... probably three #1s and more), yes, they will take him.

Are the Colts winless, with no hope in sight this season? Yes.

But the last time I checked, the Colts aren't the only shittastic team in the NFL this year.

Here's the #1 pick contenders as it stands now:

Colts 0-8

Dolphins 0-7

Cardinals 1-6

Rams 1-6

Jaguars 2-6

Broncos 2-6

Seahawks 2-5

Panthers 2-6

Vikings 2-6


So that's nine teams that have two or less wins. I don't think the Panthers(especially), Vikings, and Jaguars are nearly as bad as the other teams on that list, but an injury to a key player(Cam Newton, Adrian Peterson, Jared Allen, Maurice Jones-Drew, etc.) or two and they could be.

I think the Colts, right now, are the worst team. But you could've argued before yesterday's games that the Rams were the worst team, and they blew out a damn good Saints team, with A.J. FUCKING FEELEY starting at quarterback. You never know in this league.

Hope your team sucks for Luck all you want, but please save the jerseys until draft day next April.

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• Projections: ESPN, CBS Sports, Fantasy Sharks, FF Today, FF Toolbox.
• Rankings: Fantasy Pros, Razzball, Yahoo, Rotoworld, TO Fantasy Sports, Bruno Boys, The Fantasy Football Geek Blog, ESPN, CBS Sports, Eat Drink & Sleep Football, FF Today, Sports Illustrated, Junkyard Jake.

Other Fantasy Football Articles From Around The Web...

• Rest Of The Season Rankings (TO Fantasy Sports)
• Top 150 Flex Rankings (CBS Sports)
• Flex Rankings (TO Fantasy Sports)
• PPR Rankings (TO Fantasy Sports)
• IDP Rankings (ESPN)
• Flames & Lames (Yahoo)
• Ins & Outs (Goal-Line Stand)
• Consistency Rankings (FF Today)
• Targets & Touches (Rotoworld)
• Pass & Rush Defensive Strategery (Razzball)
• Free Agent Finds (ESPN)
• Matchups (Junkyard Jake)
• Matchups (Rotoworld)
• Matchups (CBS Sports)
• Waiver Wire (Bruno Boys)
• Waiver Wire (Fantasy Sharks)
• Start/Sit (TO Fantasy Sports)
• Start/Sit (The Hazean)
• Start/Sit (Fantasy Sharks)
• Start/Sit (Pro Football Weekly)
• 10 Most Intriguing Players Of Week 8 (Pro Football Weekly)
• Chat Replay (CBS Sports)
• Chat Replay (Sports Illustrated)

Picks Of My Own...

Sleepers

QB:

Joe Flacco- Craptastic against the Jaguars last week, but he'll rebound at home against a craptastic Cardinals secondary.

Matt Hasselbeck- Colts have allowed an NFL-high 14 passing touchdowns.

RB:

Knowshon Moreno- As much as so many of you out there want the Broncos to let Tebow loose, I'm not sold that's going to happen yet. I think Moreno gets 15+ touches with McGahee out.

Roy Helu- Tim Hightower is done for the year, and any #2 back in a Mike Shanahan system worth keeping a close eye on. The rookie out of Nebraska gets a Bills defense that is allowing 5.2 yards per carry on the ground, and was by far the worst run defense in the NFL last year.

WR:

Antonio Brown- 1. Hines Ward is out. 2. Brown had 7 catches for 102 yards last week. 3. The Patriots' pass defense is ranked last in the NFL.

Nate Washington- If I think Hasselbeck is going to have a big week, of course I think his #1 wide receiver will.

TE:

Greg Olsen- Cam Newton should go off against a depleted Vikings secondary. Olsen should be good for five+ catches and maybe a score.

Jared Cook- Another Hasselbeck target.

D/ST:

Buffalo Bills- Facing John Beck and a Redskins offense that is now without Tim Hightower, Santana Moss, and Chris Cooley.

Cincinnati Bengals-Any defense is a very good defense against the Seahawks.

Shit

QB:

Philip Rivers- Rivers has not been like himself lately, and he has a tough situation going Monday night against a rejuvenated Chiefs team, in what will be a rowdy Arrowhead Stadium.

Kevin Kolb- A brutal matchup in Baltimore.

RB:

Maurice Morris- He seems appealing as the "starting running back" with Jahvid Best out, but I think Keiland Williams might even be the better Lions back to have this week in fantasy. Whatever the case, the Broncos are allowing under 4 yards per carry.

Montario Hardesty- Goes up against the #2 run defense in football on the road, and averaging just 3.3 yards per carry.

WR:

Brandon Lloyd- He'll be valuable down the stretch, but I don't trust any Rams receivers with A.J. Feeley throwing their way. Wait until Bradford returns.

Sidney Rice- Just three fantasy points in his last two games, and Tarvaris Jackson dealing with a chest injury.

TE:

Brandon Pettigrew- The Broncos are allowing just 4.7 fantasy points per game to tight ends.

Dallas Clark-You might even want to cut him if you have another good tight end on the roster. He's never going to be the Dallas Clark you're used to seeing until Peyton is back, so next year.

D/ST:

Pittsburgh Steelers-Not a good start against the Patriots.

Washington Redskins- I like Fred Jackson to have a huge week against this run defense.

If you have any fantasy questions, either ask them in the comments or hit me up on Twitter(@SharapovasThigh).

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Thigh Five From Alice Goodwin!

Sports

• Your Week 7 Dickies Winners & Standings (Awful Announcing)
• The Horse-Collar Rule Is Horseshit (Deadspin)
• Scottie Pippen Kills A Fly On Michael Jordan's Head (The Basketball Jones)
• Soccer Player Punches Referee In The Face (Outside The Boxscore)
• Here's 200 Pics Of Jimmer Fredette & His Cheerleader Fiancee (The Big Lead)
• 10 Best Pee Wee Football Hits (With Leather)
• This Toilet Will Allow You To Pee From The Foul Line, Or 3-Point Line When You're Drunk (BroBible)
• Brandon Jacobs Is Hopeful He Won't Be A Giant In 2012 (Larry Brown Sports)
• From Me... Cubs Officially Hire Jed Hoyer As Executive VP & GM, & Jason McLeod As Senior VP Of Scouting & Player Development (The Friendly Blogfines)
• From Me... Bears Release Safety Chris Harris (Da Bear Necessities)
• From Me... Oh No: This Tim Tebow Song (theScore Buzz)

Entertainment

• Holy Crap Look At Bill Clinton's Jogging Shorts (SportsGrid)
• Eating A Live Giant Scorpion (Phil Knows Best)
• Hazed & Confused: 10 Real Hazing Stories, 100% Anonymous (The Campus Socialite)
• Haunted House Freakouts (Heavy)

Thighs

• Adriana Lima Dirty Boxing (Bob's Blitz)
• Miss COED: Haley Rowe... Pics & Video (COED Magazine)
• Miranda Kerr Busts Out Her $2.5 Million Cleavage-Amplifying Bra (Popoholic)
• Sexy Halloween Girls (Gunaxin)
• Helena Mattson Shows Why She Needs To Get More, Better Acting Roles (Guyism)
• 100 Hot Pics Of Jenny Quinn (MoonDog Sports)

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On Saturday, we showed you a couple pictures of Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski hanging out with porn star Bibi Jones during the Patriots' bye week. You've probably noticed that those pictures weren't just displayed here on the Thigh, but pretty much all over the sports blogosphere.

So naturally this became a big topic in Boston, and a topic that the Patriots' brass certainly does not want out there.

Well, today, Gronkowski spoke to the media about the pictures:

”I mean, I didn’t intend anything to hurt the reputation of anyone on the New England Patriots or on behalf of Robert Kraft,” Gronkowski said. ”It was a simple picture. That’s all. I’m here now. I’m here to talk about the Pittsburgh Steelers and the big game this weekend.”

”I was not intending to hurt anyone or ruin the reputation of the New England Patriots in any way,” Gronkowski said again. ”It’s a great organiation here, a great football program. I can’t wait to get out to practice and get focused on the Pittsburgh Steelers because that’s all I’m worried about. that’s all I care about.”

Source: Boston Herald

Not really an "apology", but still comments that could calm the media storm about the story.

But then Bibi dropped this bomb on Twitter:

Outstanding. That tweet had to result in a double facepalm from Robert Kraft.

Thigh Five: BroBible

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Well Stanford's academics credibility just took a massive hit, thanks to this asshat:


P.S. Is the table going to be okay?

Thigh Five: Reddit

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ESPN's Kenny Mayne has a new web series, 'Wider World of Sports'. For the series, he went bungee jumping in New Zealand recently.

Here's that video:

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I'm happy to say that Melanie Iglesias is back with another "flip book" video. With Halloween just around the corner, she decided to do a video of her trying on different sexy Halloween costumes.

Here it is:

God bless you, Melanie.

And you can see the video of her first flip book here.

Thigh Five: Bob's Blitz

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How is Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski spending his bye week? Apparently by banging porn star Bibi Jones.

This is after he and 19-year-old superbabe Kate Upton were hitting it off on Twitter. Damn you, Gronkowski. Damn you. Save some for the rest of us, please.

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So right before halftime of tonight's Arizona-UCLA college football game in Tucson, a streaker ran onto the field, dressed as a referee. He blew a play dead, as the teams were set up at the line of scrimmage, and they of course thought it was a real referee doing that. Well, he ran off, and then all of a sudden, the two teams started brawling.


As the guys at BroBible called it, a "prank of epic proportions".

By the way, Arizona is currently up 45-7 in the fourth quarter. But I think we can agree that the streaker is the real winner tonight, even if he has to spend the night in the slammer.

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I don't care that this video is from December, because I'd never seen it before tonight, so that makes it new to me.

It's of some dudes just absolutely dominating the road with their big wheels. Drifting like they're racing on DK Jungle Parkway.

Check it out:

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Monika Pietrasinska

And finally... a new Thigh of the Week. I'm not going to make anymore promises with these because every time I say "We'll be doing them weekly again", it seems that I don't post another one for a month+. But really, I'm going to try to at least.

Anyway, here we have Monika Pietrasinska, a 23-year-old Polish model. She's easily one of my favorite ladies that we've featured on here. Great eyes, great thighs, great boobs, great ass, great lips... great everything. She absolutely has it all.

Pics:

Prettyyyyyyyy, prettyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, pretty good. We'll certainly feature her on here more.

And don't hesitate to e-mail us(sharapovasthigh@gmail.com) any TOTW suggestions.

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Kyle Dammeyer is a member of Ohio State's water ski team(I didn't know they had these in college either), and recently he had quite the crash at the 2011 NCWSA Nationals.

Check it out:

The play-by-play call was equally as enjoyable.

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Meant to post this yesterday and spaced out...

A dude kayaking off of Redondo Beach, CA(been there a billion times since I lived right next door at Manhattan Beach for five years) ran into some blue whales(you know, the largest animals to ever exist).

And he had a GoPro camera attached to himself as it all happened. He even got some incredible underwater footage.

Here's the absolutely beautiful, amazing video:

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Via TMZ(scene in Vancouver):


In the words of George Costanza, "This is one for our side!"

Seriously, watching LaBeouf get pummeled in the face is one of the greatest things I've ever seen. This is one of the biggest douchers in Hollywood, AND he got to bang Megan Fox. Asshole. Getting his ass beaten was long overdue.

Bravo, Canadian shirtless guy. Bravo.

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It's well known throughout Colorado that my friends and I are Golden Tee addicts. Sober(eh who am I kidding?), hammered, whatever... we play this game a lot at the bar.

So I figured I'd start posting some awesome Golden Tee shots that are entertaining to watch even if you've never played the game.

We'll start off with this one that's a putt on hole 17 of Tundra Peak(one of the new courses that's featured in Golden Tee Live 2012):

Absolutely ridiculous. Whoever made this shot probably took off their pants and ran circles in celebration at the bar. I know I would've.

P.S. I made a hole-in-one last night. No biggie:

Thigh Five: Golden Tee

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Clean-up in the produce section... Bear.


Is it just me or are all of these people calm as shit over a live bear(even though it's a young one) hanging out in a grocery store? And know this: When the cub is running around, mama bear is not far behind. This cub looks all cuddly and harmless, then all of a sudden mama bear comes at you out of aisle nine and rips your fucking head off.

Thigh Five: Bob's Blitz

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Wow, really impressed bro. Almost completed six half sit-ups in that minute while getting your Grisham in. I so hope some roided-up dude walked over there and slapped that book away while yelling in an Arnold voice.

Thigh Five: Guyism

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Radio station KS 107.5 FM here in Denver made this video about Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow:

Outstanding.

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Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio, Candice Swanepoel, Lais Ribeiro and Lily Aldridge are seducing you in their Victoria's Secret lingerie in this new ad:


Thigh Five: Bob's Blitz

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In April 2012, the fourth installment of the 'American Pie' series(I'm not counting those straight-to-DVD movies which I assume were god awful) is coming to theaters, and is called 'American Reunion'. As you could easily guess, the film is about the gang returning home for their high school reunion.

Well, a teaser trailer has been released. If you saw 'American Wedding', you're aware that Jim(Jason Biggs) and Michelle(Alyson Hannigan) are now married. And in this trailer, we learn that their sex life is apparently lacking. We also learn that Jim is still up to his highly embarrassing masturbatory fails.

Check it out(NSFW!):

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Long-time visitors of the Thigh know that Rachel Bilson has always been one of my favorites. And I'm glad to say that the former 'O.C.' star is back on the television scene. Rachel will be starring in a CW series titled 'Heart of Dixie'. Now, I don't think I've seen a CW show in my life, and I'm sure this show will be nothing short of terrible, but with these promo pictures they've released of Rachel in the show, I may have to tune in on occasion(with the sound off of course) just to get a glimpse of her A+++++++++++ thigh and adorable face:


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Video description:

In "The Descent Part II," G-Shock and free-ride mountain bikers, Cameron Zink and Kyle Strait, traveled to Virgin, Utah to test the G9300 MUDMAN Compass' Twin Sensor technology, mud resistance and tough solar power while racing down the dusty slopes. The Twin Sensor allows the wearer to simultaneously check the compass and thermometer.

And the video:


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A couple days ago, we showed you how the Taiwanese animation company NMA put together a video making fun of the NBA lockout. Now, they've made an animated video for the Boston Red Sox collapse(and recent stories in regards to them: Theo to the Cubs, Tito gone, the pitchers eating fried chicken, drinking beers, and playing video games during Red Sox games, etc):


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Kate Beckinsale's been on vacation in Mexico, and showing off her outstanding 38-year-old ass:


Not bad at all. But still needs some work to match the queen of the ass pose, Jessica Alba:


You can see more of Kate's hot vacation pics at Egotastic.

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This took place on the set of ABC's Charlie's Angels:

More! More! I need more!

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Nothing brings the laughs like a good fart. I remember back in high school during an exam in some science class when my good friend(who is a daily reader of this site) let a monster fart fly. We all start laughing, and our teacher yells out, "Who ripped?" Friend: "I did!", raising his head with the biggest smile on his face.

Another fine fart moment, which also took place in high school: At American Pie 2 with a couple of friends the first night it came out in a packed theater. One of the few "serious" moments of the movie was taking place, when my friend let one roar so loudly that the entire theater crowd could hear it. Everybody burst out laughing, and I was in tears laughing(and from smelling this) for a good half hour.

Good times.

P.S. I absolutely lost it when that guy in the video farted on the apple in a grocery store and then ate it.

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Markus Duran, a junior walk-on Pacific's basketball team, made a video showing off his dunking skills.

Check it out:


360? Through the legs in mid-air? Over a trash can? Markus Duran's got it with ease. Just lighting the air up like it's nothing. Get that "white men can't jump" shit out of here, Wesley Snipes.

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A 46-year-old man in Buffalo Grove, Illinois found heaven on Tuesday. Or so he thought/told police.

What he actually came across was a refrigerated beer trailer that belonged to the Schwaben Verein German heritage club and Grove Banquets. And as the TribLocal-Buffalo Grove reports, "The trailer houses kegs connected to taps on the outside. Realizing he had nearly unlimited access cold beer, the man grabbed a nearby pitcher and began drinking." Of course he did.

Well, the next day at noon, staff members at the banquet hall found him absolutely hammered(obviously) and called the cops.

Before being taken to a nearby hospital, he told the cops that he didn't think he'd done anything wrong, and that he thought he'd died and gone to heaven, which was a free beer truck. I can't hate on this guy because that would certainly be heaven to me as well.

No charges were thrown the dude's way by either the police or the club.

Thigh Five: Huffington Post

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Anna Kournikova's still got it, as you can see in by her pictures in the November issue of Women's Health.

Pics:


One of my all-time favorites.

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Outstanding as always.

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As a dude, I usually hate seeing this sort of thing because I know how much it sucks to hit your nuts like that. I remember one time as a kid in North Carolina where I went off of a ramp on my BMX. My nuts landed right on the bike frame instead of the seat... probably the worst pain of my life. I really think it was even less enjoyable than what it would be like to have Rosie O'Donnell sit on your face for a minute. Was just terrible.

But this dock-jumping asshat totally got what he was asking for. He tried to be a hot shot and paid the price.

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The Slanch Report(go give them a thigh five) tipped us this video of a big ass Red Hartebeest crushing the shit out of a mountain biker in South Africa during a race.

Check it out:

Just an absolute crush job. Mountain bike in the Red Hartbeest's land and this is what you're gonna get. No flags for hits to the head in the jungle.

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Recently we showed you Derrick Rose's awesome new commercial for Adidas that shows off his new shoes, the adiZero Rose 2. Well, Adidas released a behind-the-scenes video of the commercial shoot that includes some commentary from Rose.

Check it out:


The shoes are now available to buy, and here's a close-up look at them:


The shoes are now available for sale, in black or white.

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Disneyland and Disney World are amazing... I don't care how old you are. I lived within an hour of Disneyland for five years as a kid and we used to go all the time. Hell, we went there the day after Christmas last year as my parents live in the San Diego area, and we had an amazing time.

Well, this girl's parents surprised her with a Disneyland trip for her sixth birthday. And her reaction is priceless:


If that video doesn't bring a smile to your face, you need some help.

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I'm rooting for the Rangers to win the World Series just to see what celebration she's going to have for us after that.

Thigh Five: Guyism

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The lovely Ali Larter recently hit up the tennis courts in West Hollywood. Check out the pics:


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